b e n j a m i n f a l k e n b e r g » Humor

Funny The First Hundred Times… Maybe More

Dad — Tue, 24 Feb 2009 14:20:30 +0000

Update: Just in case you can’t see the embedded Vimeo video below, here’s the direct link to it on the Vimeo website:

http://vimeo.com/3343680

Our apologies to anyone that had trouble!

So I cracked this joke at dinner last night, and Benjamin thought it was pretty funny, so he kept repeating it. And of course, I made him repeat it again for a quick little video. His fake-laughing really is super-funny, though maybe you have to be there to appreciate it. ;)

The joke, in case the audio’s as poor as the video (recorded with my crappy cellphone camera), is “Is your nose running?” “Yes.” “Better go catch it!” followed by his classic fake-laughing and a request to watch the recording we’d just made. Enjoy!

Christmas 2007 Seems Like So Long Ago

Stacey and Alex — Fri, 12 Dec 2008 17:53:50 +0000

This is a picture from their 2007 visit with Santa. It was Zachary’s first Christmas, at only 4 months old. It was Benjamin’s second; he was not quite two years old here. They haven’t been to see Santa yet this year; we’ve not (yet?) made any specific plans, so who knows. Zachary took his first Santa visit here a lot better than Benjamin did his first time at 10 months (B. was basically terrified).

It’s worth noting (again) that Zachary is pulling really, really hard on Santa’s very real beard in this picture. Poor St. Nick… That look on his face? Pure pain. We apologized, of course, but it was pretty darn funny…

It’s strange looking at this picture, as both kids have grown up so much since it was taken. Zachary’s walking now. Benjamin’s in gymnastics classes, knows all his numbers and letters… Their growth this past year has been pretty amazing.

More holiday pictures on the way as we get them processed and uploaded. Those of you that end up with our photo Christmas card–going out Any Day Now™–we hope you enjoy that, too. Happy Holidays!

Yoda Loves the Toad-a

Stacey and Alex — Thu, 04 Dec 2008 15:21:39 +0000

Enjoy our cat Yoda sleeping with one of his best friends, Froggy. He does this regularly. It’s pretty funny seeing just how comfortable he gets with both this frog and a teddy bear (Barnesy) that often shares the space. if you recall our initial Yoda picture, he was pretty tiny. He’s much larger now. I actually think he’s getting fat, too… We probably need to cut down on the food a little.

The other point of posting this picture is we’re testing MediaRSS functionality on the site. You probably don’t know what that is, and you probably don’t care. No worries, as most–if not all–of you won’t notice any difference at all. :)

Pine Noodles

Stacey and Alex — Thu, 16 Oct 2008 02:34:12 +0000

Not pine needles, according to Benjamin. Pine noodles.

Image is from the camping part of our vacation last week.

Rules Of Being A Toddler

Dad — Tue, 29 May 2007 03:45:15 +0000

Sent to me recently; no idea where it’s from, but it’s pretty funny, so I thought I’d share.

Most don’t actually apply to Benjamin (yet?), but some do. Enjoy!

If it is on, I must turn it off.
If it is off, I must turn it on.
If it is folded, I must unfold it.
If it is a liquid, it must be shaken, then spilled.
If it a solid, it must be crumbled, chewed or smeared.
If it is high, it must be reached.
If it is shelved, it must be removed.
If it is pointed, it must be run with at top speed.
If it has leaves, they must be picked.
If it is plugged, it must be unplugged.
If it is not trash, it must be thrown away.
If it is in the trash, it must be removed, inspected, and thrown on the floor.
If it is closed, it must be opened.
If it does not open, it must be screamed at.
If it has drawers, they must be rifled.
If it is a pencil, it must write on the refrigerator, monitor, or table.
If it is full, it will be more interesting emptied.
If it is empty, it will be more interesting full.
If it is a pile of dirt, it must be laid upon.
If it is stroller, it must under no circumstances be ridden in without protest.
It must be pushed by me instead.
If it has a flat surface, it must be banged upon.
If Mommy’s hands are full, I must be carried.
If Mommy is in a hurry and wants to carry me, I must walk alone.
If it is paper, it must be torn.
If it has buttons, they must be pressed.
If the volume is low, it must go high.
If it is toilet paper, it must be unrolled on the floor.
If it is a drawer, it must be pulled upon.
If it is a toothbrush, it must be inserted into my mouth.
If it has a faucet, it must be turned on at full force.
If it is a phone, I must talk to it.
If it is a bug, it must be swallowed.
If it doesn’t stay on my spoon, it must be dropped on the floor.
If it is not food, it must be tasted.
If it IS food, it must not be tasted.
If it is dry, it must be made wet with drool, milk, or toilet water.
If it is a car seat, it must be protested with arched back.
If it is Mommy, it must be hugged.